In an hour-long lecture to mark the awarding of the Wellcome Book Prize, Edmund de Waal analysed his own grief over the death of his uncle, then looked beyond his own experience to argue for a new treatment of bereavement in society. He said we had lost the rituals of the past, and replaced them with clichés that denied people the truth of their own unique experiences.
“Moving on as a concept is for stupid people, because any sensible person knows, grief is a long-term project,” he said. “I refuse to rush. And that’s this moment now in our public space; let’s not rush, and let’s, please God, start the public conversation about what grief is, and why grief matters.”
He showed photographs of his own work, as well as of public spaces which allowed people to grieve: The Holocaust Memorial in Berlin, the Vietnam War memorial in Washington DC, as well as museums . He also read poetry by Walt Whitman and Emily Dickinson to show that every person experiences grief in their own way: and this is why clichés are so damaging.
“There is nothing worse than sentimentality, there is nothing worse than sentimentality,” he said. “Why do we only talk to the bereaved about endurance and strength.”
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