Part memoir, part commentary on masculinity, this isn’t so much for men, as about them. Raven has been trying to distill what it is about men that has kept him intrigued his whole life. Firstly, he loves them. Secondly, he can see how problematic they are. Thirdly, both these things converge in his own sense of self and his own masculinity. His book is about particular dynamics, a cautious reverence of a life lived in parallel with other men, observing masculinity’s odd amorphous boundaries. He doesn’t shy away from difficult truths, but there’s plenty to laugh about. Raven Smith has been 32 for several years and lives in London with his husband and cat. He talks to journalist Nell Frizzell.